Snarky Movie Robot

Category: Movie Reviews

  • 13 Going on 30 (2004) Movie Review

    Does 13 Going on 30 hold up? Let’s find out:  So we start off in 1987. Jenna Rink (Christa B. Allen) wants to get in with the Six Chicks (sounds like the name of a restaurant), and… The Six Chicks are kind of like the Plastics from Mean Girls. …and the Six Chicks (sounds like the name of a…

  • The Beautician and the Beast (1997) Movie Review

    The Beautician and the Beast time, baby! So we start off with Enchanted before Enchanted did Enchanted. We then meet Joy Miller (Fran “The Nanny” Drescher). Joy is a beautician and she is a teacher at a beauty school. A fire happens in a classroom one day because cigarette + hair spray= fire. Joy is able to rescue some students and animals…

  • Welcome Home, Roxy Carmichael (1990) Movie Review

    Does Welcome Home, Roxy Carmichael hold up? Let’s find out: So we start off by meeting Dinky Bossetti (Winona Ryder). Dinky is adopted. Dinky is struggling with bullying and adoptive parents who just don’t get her. Dinky is friends with animals. Rochelle (Dinky’s adoptive mom) (Frances “Rose’s mom in Titanic” Fisher) wants Dinky to be into makeup. Les (Dinky’s…

  • Logan (2017) Movie Review

    Logan time, baby! So we start off in 2029 and with a Logan/Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) fight. Logan inspects his battle damage. Logan is working as a limo driver. He is looking after the senile Charles Xavier (Patrick Stewart, in his most challenging performance of the series and Stewart rises to the occasion). Caliban is assisting Logan in…

  • The Wolverine (2013) Movie Review

    Is The Wolverine any good? Let’s find out:  So we start off in in 1945. Japanese soldiers leave as soon as they see bombers approaching.  Ichiro Yashida (Haruhiko Yamanouchi) shows mercy to the American POWs. One of the POWs is Logan/Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) and Logan believes that he is safer where he currently is. Yashida sees his superiors prepping…

  • X-Men Origins: Wolverine (2009) Movie Review

    Is X-Men Origins: Wolverine any good? Let’s find out: So we start off with ill Jimmy Howlett. Victor is taking care of Jimmy and Victor is the son of Thomas Logan. An intoxicated Logan comes. He wants to talk to Jimmy’s mother and he offs Jimmy’s father. Jimmy and Victor discover that they have bone claws. Jimmy (Hugh…

  • Supergirl (1984) Movie Review

    Supergirl time, baby!  So we start off with Kara Zor-El (Kal-El’s cuz/Jor-El’s niece) (Helen Slater) residing in Argo City. Argo City did not go down with Krypton because it got into the Innerspace. Zaltar (Peter O’Toole) lets Kara see the Omegahedron and this thing is the battery behind Argo. Sidebar/Salad Bar: Did that penile-looking object going into the Omegahedron seem…

  • Mr. Wrong (1996) Movie Review

    Is Mr. Wrong worthy of its notorious reputation? Let’s find out: So we start off with Martha Alston (Ellen DeGeneres) imprisoned. Investigators call her Mrs. Crawford and we find out why she shot someone on her wedding day (happens to the best of us, girlie). We flashback. Martha goes to her younger sister’s wedding and…

  • Lisa Frankenstein (2024) Movie Review

    Is Lisa Frankenstein any good? Let’s find out:  So we start off in 1989. Lisa Swallows (Kathryn Newton) is trying to get over the death of her mother, who was offed by an axe murderer, and… So I Was Offed By an Axe Murderer. Lisa’s dad (Dale (Joe Chrest)) gives Lisa an evil stepmother in the form of…

  • Penelope (2006 or 2008) Movie Review

    Is Penelope any good? Let’s find out:  Once upon a time, Clara fell in love with Ralph Wilhern and she became pregnant by him. However, Ralph’s family disapproved; so, Ralph married somebody else. Clara offs herself, and… That got morbid real fast. Anyway, Clara’s witchy mom (who looks like Jeff Goldblum in The Fly) hexes the Wilherns so that the…