Is Lisa Frankenstein any good?

Let’s find out:

 So we start off in 1989. Lisa Swallows (Kathryn Newton) is trying to get over the death of her mother, who was offed by an axe murderer, and…

So I Was Offed By an Axe Murderer.

Lisa’s dad (Dale (Joe Chrest)) gives Lisa an evil stepmother in the form of Janet (Carla Gugino), and…

Janet (clearly) went insane due to the current state of the Spy Kids franchise.

Lisa also gets a popular stepsister in the form of Taffy (Liza Soberano).

Lisa is kind of a cemetery dweller at the Bachelor’s Grove Cemetery.

Lisa accidentally electrocutes herself in a tanning bed (happens to the best of us, girlie). Taffy kind of drags Lisa to a party and, at said party, Lisa winds up accidentally drugged and Doug (one of her classmates) (Bryce Romero) gropes her.

Lisa goes to the cemetery and she “talks” to the grave of someone who died in 1837. The dead person had been in love with someone who left him. Lightning offed the dead person and lightning brings the dead person back to life as  the Creature (Cole Sprouse).

The Creature gets into Lisa’s home. Lisa realizes who he is and stuffs him in her closet. The Creature is a little more put-together than Jeff Goldblum in The Fly and he looks like Jeff Goldblum in The Fly.

Lisa tries to blame the house’s current state on a burglar and Janet is all “She wants attention!” A worm winds up in Janet’s food and Janet does her best impression of Gaston in Beauty and the Beast. The Creature offs Janet, Janet loses an ear, Lisa and the Creature put Janet in the cemetery and Lisa uses electricity to give the Creature Janet’s ear. 

Lisa sets a trap for Doug, the Creature offs Doug, Doug gets put into the cemetery, the Creature gets a hand and the Creature and Lisa start to form a connection.

The cops start looking into Janet and Doug being missing in action. Lisa goes to see Michael (her love interest) (Henry Eikenberry); but, Michael is having er… ice cream with Taffy. The Creature hacks off Michael’s buttered pecan/whipped cream maker and Michael bleeds to death.  The Creature tries to go after Taffy; but, Lisa stops him.

The Creature goes to the cemetery. Lisa and Taffy follow and Lisa gives Taffy her mom’s rosary. 

The Creature to Lisa is all “I love you” and Lisa and the Creature put a cop in an open grave. Thanks to Michael’s buttered pecan/whipped cream maker, Lisa and the Creature have er… ice cream. The cops are after Lisa; so, Lisa has the Creature electrocute her via tanning bed.

Dale and Taffy go to Lisa and Janet’s graves. 

The Creature reads Percy Shelley’s To Mary to Lisa.

I had a good time with this one.

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